Feeling so out of sync walking upon shattered glass paths,
Drinking upon dreams poured only to fill and become the past,
Salty air, clouted mind, nowhere to run, walking alone a step behind.
The thoughts they hide in the shadows to protect what I see,
Tomorrow dancing on the balance of today's reality.
Mind constantly saying no, while my soul is drowning in a pool of fantasy.
Frozen again like time standing still, only left to contemplate my own free will.
Numb to everything that cuts like razors in a pool of alcohol,
Saying it constantly yet no ones around to hear my call,
Broken bridges leading to a crumbling wall,
Fading into a breathless state, my own destiny left to contemplate.
Columns, rows, facts and figures, yet nothing understood, nothing triggers,
the understanding that's needed to make sense,
A plague placed upon the emptiness of the meaning of life's essence.

It's Not About Me

Fading fast, bending over to be fucked again by yet another crashing car,
Another fallen star, just being blown by the lips of fallen angels,raising the bar,
Twisted spirals, glass shards, being cut by life's hards,in the shadows i have drown lost that hand of cards,
But its not about me...
Being stung by another day, another hour, savored by the illusions as they devour,
Its just minds interpretations dancing in the dark, getting high off the spark,
Only for a passing moment as you breathe, turning back around now it's time to leave,
pseudo coded to comfort my own insecurities, of what i believe, who i was, who i am, and all other obscurities.
But its not about me...
Lightning pulsing through my veins,as it drains every ambition from within. Not fighting for freedom, no just cause, just the memory's between fine lines of the future and the flaws. Canceling the credit cards, the plastic currency that only gratifies for a moment, as I am left indebted to life's dues that guards the memory's that torment.
But its not about me...
Spread thinly feeling like just a layer, being played again like a piano player, i will not say what is fair because i am unclear on how it all began. Just another misinterpretation,another deliberation, upon the souls of man. As this is undoubtedly just how it is suppose to be, i know not the beginning or the end of iniquity.
But its not about me...
Deaf ears to a table that as been set as i neglect the shores that speak louder than any sea. I only hear the grains of sand slipping through the hourglass that will one day take me.The joy being replaced by tasks i do to keep the morale of those around to see. But they do not notice the lost soul in the shadows dark, because of the scars that taint every mission in the park..

Untitled

As I close my eyes tight,
Silently I am,
Sitting by the ocean,
Untangling thoughts,
Thoughts of,
Aggression,
Depression,
From every angle,
Every direction,
As stones are thrown,
The glass cracks,
But nothing broken,
Embracing each word spoken,
Taking in each token,
Friends,
Family,
Strangers,
Still silently I am drained,
From the expeditions of the process,
The tide rises and falls,
Waves crash and calm,
Still standing strong,
Each thought fine tuned,
Into the melody,
That carries me on,
Self shielding from the rain,
It is silence,
And the ocean,
That relieves all emotion.
Every hour every minute,
Coming fast,
From every state,
Slow burning,
This is reaction,
and the wheels keep turning.

Soul Tied

Painted blue skies,
Clouds forming shapes right before my eyes,
Gasping, drowning in awww,
Finding reality found through a dreamers ball,
Dangling on dandelions,
The sweet nectar begins to fall,
Sinking, down, to the ground,
my bleeding heart pounds emotionally,
into pieces,
It never ceases,
Continual aggression,
Tainted depression,
Casual rounds,
Silent sounds,
Heard only through the crashing tide,
It is what it is...
Soul tied...

Run Away

Believe

Believe without seeing it is reality,
Fate, love, destiny,
And the chemistry between you and me,
Know without seeing because you believe,
That the bond we share,
It is not only what you perceive.
Embrace the thoughts that pass through your mind,
Believing in fate, and the future,
Not worrying about what has been,
Or what’s left behind.
Know what you believe I already feel,
that’s what makes this so very real.
I have faith in what you believe…
S.G

I Don't Need To Be Lifted

I don't need to be lifted,
Just to fall down,
I have felt the pain,
Bled to the ground,
Theories form like wells,
Deep down in my soul,
As I contemplate,
On how it is,
Just to feel whole,
Seeds have been planted,
Roses died along passion,
My life is real,
Not just a fashion,
I don't need to be lifted,
To shatter like glass,
Just need reality,
As I walk knowingly,
Away from my past,
No deeds to great,
No stress to much,
Just need your smile,
And your angelic touch,
A large mystery,
that keeps on spinnin,
I don't need to be lifted,
To keep on winnin,
Another day,
Another hour,
Time keeps ticking,
I don't need patterns,
For lessons to thicken,
Along with the power,
Simply stated,
It is closed,
All faded,
Intricately positioned,
A delicacy,
With self made tradition.

In contempt of contemplation, no regulation, for celebration, my own obligation, no mediation, no medication.
A warped soul, with mind control, silenced echo, no one will ever know, i don't have a taste i have a bowl,
Gum drops melted, sugars not so sweet, my own battle, feelin beat,yet fast on my feet,
No it don't seem fair, don't really care, worn tried, bare, my minds eye stare,
Genuine as it can be, the reality, eating me, setting free, only the wind hearing me...

A Collab With OL SKOOL

A Vision of Love


A Seoulja Girl & OL SKooL Collaboration


I am lost in your eyes
Each morning they open wide
With loves bright rays and colorful displays
Of rainbows and a beautiful sunrise
And then your lips part
Words come forth on rhythmic air
As soft scents of jasmine ease from your hair
Mesmerized by the movement of your lips
My hands melted into the curves of your hips
Feeling the breathing heat from your skin
Stirring the desires of my passion for you from within
There is a comfort in your presence
Satisfaction in the flavor of your essence
There for me in a time of need
When I thought there was no love to be found
You came into my world and turned it upside down
Bringing a smile to my face
Filling that empty place
Surrounded by your elegance and grace
My skies are filled
And you are the sun, clouds, and all I see
Listening to you speak to me.
I hear your words of tranquility
Even when you do not speak
An inner connection so very unique
You surround me with courage
Like I have never felt before
Your strength keeps me inspired
And your unconditional love is the core
From the freshness of your skin
To the sparklets in your eyes
I want to feel you from within
Until tomorrows sunrise
Entangle me in your love's delight
Forgetting the shadow's of sadness
that keep you awake at night
I now know what true paradise is
I have been caught
and never want to be set free
Letting go of the pain
Evolving with love you place within me
As you scribe each moment we share
No one is left to compare
You have undoubtly caught my attention
You reside in my heart
And have shown me a new dimension.
In a place beyond this world
Where you and I have connected mind, body and soul
With tenderness commanding our beings
And making empty places whole
Feel the comfort of warmth in my arms holding you tight
The closeness of our bodies under the cover of night
Twisted into the mist of sweet bliss
Never have I felt a love and passion as deep as this
Looking into your eyes
They silently tell me my heart will be safe in here
No reason to closed off and cloaked in fear
I am vulnerable and open to your advance
Ready to receive the gifts of your love and romance
Ready to trust unconditionally
Trusting you with my heart entirely
What a blank canvas a bared soul can be
Waiting for you to paint your masterpiece of love inside of me
Priceless the gifts we give and receive
I had lost faith in love but you have made me believe
So all I can do in return is reciprocate all that you bestow
Release my anxieties and just let love flow
There is no comparison when it comes to what we share
Fantasies have subsided and reality is here
Our truest love's masterpiece in the making
There will be no denial and no forsaking
You are a genuine man that was taken for granted
Filled with convictions deeply implanted
Now you can release the anguish of the past
Fill them up with new memories
of a love that is substantial at last
Nourish my body quench my soul
I am no longer half but now I am whole
Engulfed in amazement like a twinkling star
You have broadened my outlook
being just who you are
Empowering a serene vision of love once again
Embedding your gift deep within
With our spirits lifted and our hearts on the line
We have found something no other can define,
Embrace this melody in the depth of your heart
Sharing each other till death do us part

My words just aren't enough...

It's time to cross the bridge,
Where I apologize meets action,
To show my word's aren't empty,
I apologize is just a fraction,
Time to turn it all around,
Show you what I mean,
Because people like you,
Do not come but once in a lifetime.

You are the tune that I dance to,
The light that shine's so bright.
You are the one I turn to,
when everything's not right.

My words just aren't enough.

Yesterday is over, yet your still here,
Today is a new sunrise,
I cannot wait to hold you near,
I watch the hourglass of sands,
As I embrace the moments,
I know our fate is left in destiny's hands.
I can't help but playout the future,
All within my mind,
Seeing only happy moments of you and I,
Dancing upon the moonlit skies,
With not a care in the world,
Breathing in the open air,
It is just us there.

I know I say it all the time,
That's because I do,
But I can't resist my lips,
From telling you,
I say because I mean it,
I'll show you as long as I live,
I know I don't have much,
But to you my heart I give,

My words just aren't enough.

We don't have to have nothing,
but the clothes on our backs,
I just want to live a lifetime,
Living your love till then end,
Yeah it would be nice to have it,
Have all that life can give,
But as long as I have you love,
That's all I need to live,
Let the sun rise and set,
The souls of sin fade,
As long as I got you by my side,
I know I got it made,
Cause you put this smile on my face
and get my heart beating,
There is nothing out there that can
erase
This love that I am feelin.

My words just aren't enough.

I'm Mama

It's simple, it's been stated,
your a sperm donor,
we jus dated,
So don't be tryin to kick some truth,
cuz you not daddy you silly ass youth,
Let me break it down,
this the way it goes,
I aint one of those roundaway hoes,
I BEEN takin care of mine,
And we doin jus fine,
Befor you and after you,
we do what we do,
still the same,
don't be tryin,
lieing,
to express your name,
Its your loss our gain,
I do not answer petty ass shit,
If you thought you knew,
It's best you quit,
I'm not mad just understand,
you donated but wasn't a dad,
So when you step bumpin your gums,
Add the shit up and equate the sums,
hmmm...did i ever support my own,
naw but i'm daddy,
explain that when they grown.
Tell me one of their favorite games,
oops i forgot you only know their names,
Better yet tell me what the clinic said,
oh you wouldn't know,
you think he's fucked up in the head,
Tell me any of their sizes,
You don't want them, you want prizes,
Shut your mouth don't even bother,
M'fer it takes more than words,
To be a father,
naw it don't just get that good,
don't get it misunderstood,
Cause aint nobody stutin this shit,
Don't want ya around,
time to quit,
Buy yourself a cookie,
for the blessing you made me,
But don't think ever,
your words can fade me,
Cause I know who has been down,
wheneva no one else was around,
I know who puts food on the table,
while your out finding you,
being unstable,
I know how far I have came,
without them calling out your name,
Not mad about what I gotta do,
This is US not about you,
Quit thinkin I'm tryin to cause you drama,
Cuz it's simple you aint even in the equation,
I am and always will be MAMA,
So get with the real,
feel how i feel,
don't be tryin to place blame,
understand still the same,
imma look out for mine,
till the end of time,
have been doing it for a minute,
and not ever gonna quit,
so feed yourself lies if you want,
I'm through,
Smoke that blunt....

AMAZING

Genuinely
you leave me
gasping,
breathless
yearning,
wanting,
to climax,
to your level,
You play each key,
high, low,
without fail,
authentically.

My mind,
intrigued,
My heart,
beating,
in sequence,
to you,
desiring life,
with each octave,
ascertained.

I value,
your essence,
the soft petal,
of your eloquence,
your fragrance,
uncharted,
intellectually,
inspiring,
like no other,
prolific,
euphony,
I cannot deny,
you are,
AMAZING....

I stand still with breaths of hope,
Intertwining the twisted rope,
The reverence of ambitions set ahead,
My mental intellect to be fed,
The fragrance of peaceful day's,
Revealing guidance through this maze,
The ambience of your love from afar,
Shall not reap the scorns that scar,
Not another day not another hour,
Do i choose to empower,
This fueled fire,
As it chases my hope my desire...

Diary

Lemme go off again,
Let you within,
This seoul of mine,
Right on time,
Imma be fine,
Cause it will be,
jus me,
at the front line,
evolving,
toward my very own,
Destiny,
I may stumble,
But don't get it twisted,
This woman,
Strives,
And If you blink,
You missed it,
The haters,
The fakes,
Don't try to stop,
Just sink,
Below,
Cause Imma show ya,
Where to put it,
And how to go,
I don't have time,
For nothin but REAL,
Just read the icies,
Of the diamond words,
Get inspired,
and feel
my flow...

Listen to the beats,
That keep me,
Constantly,
Thriving,
Surviving,
Diving,
Into the deep,
The hooks,
that make me,
Remember,
What to lose,
and who to keep,
These tracks,
Hold memories,
The emery's,
That scratch,
More realities,
Than I can speak,
Writing to,
The old school jams,
Throw backs,
Forgotten tracks,
Filled with,
Facts,
Of Love,
Healing,
Lust,
Hate,
Desire,
My Ambitions,
My Fire,
That fuels,
All echoes,
In my mind,
Of each challenge,
I accomplish,
to become,
Better,
Grounded,
and
Divine.

Talkin bout,
The greatest,
Beats,
The tightest,
Flow,
I'm mesmerized,
upon thoughts,
And let em go,
For all to see,
All to read,
My Life,
Written,
My Poetic,
Diary.

Anything Goes

Words, adverbs, verbs, adjectives, nouns,
All together making sounds, of laughs, cries, anger, and tears,
Confessions, sins, grins, ends, all placed on paper over the years,
The silent pages screaming out for all to see,
The depth, the character, ambitions, and passions inside of me,
Who would know the hate, the anger, the pain,
The rants, the raves, day's of going insane,
If it weren't for my silent flows no one knows,
No mediator just a place where anything goes.

Let's make it happen...

Lets make it happen,
Look out here we come,
No limits, just us,
Showin everyone,
Invincible Connection,
Sensational Erection,
Baby let's do this,
Ready,
Set,
Go,
No more holdin back,
No more stoppin this flow,
Cuz I'm holdin you,
You feelin me,
Time to shine,
That's what we do.
Love overload,
Promises told,
We got this,
Taking action,
Deuce bein bold,
Breakin cycles,
Writen Titles,
the time has come,
Let's see the world,
We sweatin no one.

New Era

Lets just plan today,
Never losing sight of tomorrow,
Canceling all the days of pain,
Losing the songs of sorrow,
No more chasing dreams,
Because they are right here,
Coming true like never before,
In the moments we share,
Insatiable attraction,
But the time is now,
Me loving you,
An easy satisfaction,
No need to know how,
A new era, a new time,
No ocean I wouldn't swim,
Not a day I want to miss,
Not a mountain i will not climb,
Just for your tender kiss.
It is me and you,
Believing in what we share,
Don't need approval,
It is just us here,
Oh I can breathe,
I can see so clear,
I can sing a sweet song,
Dance to a new beat,
Just because you are near.

Love Divine

Chocolate, strawberry's and cream,
You are the reality to my dream,
All before I have stood in line,
But now you are my love divine,
Loving,
Caring,
Amazing,
One of a kind,
Who could ask for more?
Strength,
Integrity,
Ambition,
True Love,
It's worth fighting for...
Coffee, tea, and lemonade....
Your every love song ever played.
The whole world could be fine,
If they found a love this divine.
Persevering,
Intelligent,
Heroic...
Can not be out shined...
He truly can't ever be defined.
This love that stays on my mind,
The one and only Love Divine....

IF YOU

If I could hold you close, embrace the silent cheer, feel the warmth of your skin, smell your fragrance in the air,
I would take the moment, and never let it go, dangle like a shining star, and this love you should know,
If I could wash away the dirt, i would make it shiny and clean, but this i can't as you know, so it's time to show you what I mean,
Each day for us is a new endeavor, i don't want to take for granted, your love i want to share forever, in my heart eternally planted,
The seeds i have sown have been many, good ones, bad ones, mistakes i can't count, there have been plenty,
My past reaps my future and every counterpart, but no more doe's it define me, or the love I have in my heart,
The options that I made for you in the past , really were not there, but if you allow me to, i would love to show you just how much i care,
Our only obstacle is self and God our only direction, please know i love you, you hold my deepest affection,
If i could kiss your lip's and caress your skin, show you I am yours, i would give you what i feel from within, and wipe away the blurs,
I know each day is a challenge, more like a mystery, being unsure of intentions, seeing into reality,
Just know I desire to love you, unconditionally, with all i have to give, i choose morals to abide by for you and our family,
Hand in hand, day by day, seeing the world with you, it will take you walking away, for me to say i'm through,
Because until that day come's i will be your wife, owning each vow i have spoken to you, continually striving to live our life, for blessings to shine through,
Let's take it day by day, moving toward our goal, let's make dreams come true, making the other half whole,
I love you to no end, I can't put in word's what I would do, but if you are really ready, it is a new beginning for me and you.

To my husband....

Intervention

Now its came to me, more like a positive epiphany, its right in front of me, for all the word to see, it's called reality,
I can't change mistakes I have made, my life i cannot trade, i need to let this hurt fade, befor the demons take me away and invade,
My soul has not been taken, my wisdom is not mistaken, my world may be shaken, but there is no more frontin and no more fakin,
My thoughts I now convey, the burdens i will lay,give them to the Lord each day, and secure it with the words I pray,
I own it, i live it, in my spirit, i have to forgive it, the options i will stand on and now commit, bit by bit,
I see who is for me, and what i need to believe, what i need to do, so i can receive, and what mistakes i need to stop and start to perceive,
Just because i say this, doen't make my wrongs right, just because I beleive this doesn't mean I won't cry at night, i see i am losing the battle, and need new intervention to defeat my plight.

Silent Liar

I hear your calling me a liar in quiet silence,
But it is in the words you don't speak,
I can't deny you your own opinion,
But that jus really aint me,
But I can't help trying,
To show you all,
Possibility...

Trials tribulations that is what is in the front of you and me,
I want to over come this together and learn to trust,
But are you really ready for it all of good and bad,
For the the battles ahead we look upon,
The beginning of what we never had,
Taking time to mend our souls,
Serenity...

Can't play like I have all the answers you want,
But I know if I am blessed with the chance,
There isn't any time to front,
So ask me what you will,
Tell me what you see,
Can we be one,
Security...

Funny how past effects all future incidentally,
I have no more words to offer now,
So you can love or leave me,
But either way I mean,
Exactly what I say,
For me you are,
Eternity...

Part 2

Forced to touch the blue note, pull it from the sky, sing the song that has carried me through,
throw in what has made me cry,
Deny the evil for my closest cares, take it and run, overcome my fears, there is more out there than this I just know,
Circles causing death to clowns, chasing every rainbow, the red balloons have burst, the painted face no more,
Time for healing, unveiling truth, and exploring endless possibilities, overcoming death but respecting all memories,
Not saying it won't come again, just saying I am going to try, to kiss this last dark night, and tell the rest goodbye,
The hexes are there, but I can go on breathing if I know, it didn't take anyone but me, to make myself glow.
So my invitation starts right here with me, the delight of knowing, i have endless possibility's.

What it's about....

It is not about the decisions I have made,
It's all about what i take from them,
What i do with what I take,
And how i choose to,
Proceed...

It is not about just myself so selfishly grieving,
It is about the journeys i walk away from,
What I choose to do better now,
And what I choose to leave,
Succeed...

It is not about the size of the mountain,
It is what it takes to overcome it,
What I do in training,
And it will happen,
Defeat...

It is not about forgetting then it has no meaning,
It is about life and living to the fullest,
What I do to persevere,
And how I continue,
Memories...

Baggage

Missed opportunities, deceitful unities, broken communities, all baggage locked up and payin the fees,
Gigantic in size, heavy despise, hopeful cries, all twisted within the judgmental eyes, breaking down she tries,
Lost even with GPS, lost in a mess, who woulda guessed, as her heart confessed, the imperfection that's tainted her dress,
No more beauty only iniquity, losing upon ambiguity, who cares about sanity, now its all probability,
Baggage in piles, hidden by smiles, the classic styles, of her trials, the alcohol carries her now for miles...

Poetic Death

When I die do not mourn over my life's end,
Allow my poetic reflection to be your muse,
Feel the laughter I once carried,
Through the scribble of my pen,
Hear the def tones of my passion,
Playing upon your minds eye.
Remember me shouting in silence,
Because on paper is where I cried,
Through adjective's, verb's, and noun's,I plead,
All of my heart in the word's I bled,
My life's written in a spread,

My depth exhaled by breaths I have taken,
In between the pages I have exhausted upon.
Remember the things I did not take for granted,
The Poet's were the seeds to my inspiration planted.
My soul defined by every word embedded.
When I die, only then will my lips remain closed,
Yet still I will speak, emotion exposed,
Allow my words to be your newest endeavor,
Death to a poet, yet I speak forever.

My Sin

Caught between the facts of reality and the dreams of the fantasy,
A golden dream broken from my very own action,
Chest tightening with the thought of it all,
There is no excuse good enough,
The pain is not bad enough,
I have lost this battle,
Already Mentally.

I have cried tears that could fill oceans of guilt around this world,
I fight constantly all alone within my very own soul,
I do not need the pity I don't feel sad for me,
I have am now facing the wicked path,
The one I despise the most,
Only this time I own it,
My Reflection.

To hate the weakness and fight for the strength which is pure,
But then to allow self to overcome and take it away,
The whole morale I abide by is contaminated,
Inconsiderate there is no real excuse,
I have raped my own conscious,
Reaping evil thoughts,
My Demons.

I feel this I will allow to haunt my ever being for eternity,
The silence of scraping sounds will echo all my life,
As I scream from within me in a silent web,
Evolving yet held by my shame,
Hell has my name on it,
Like a firey scribe,
My Sin.

Lost In Time

Kiss my lips, seductive passion,
Feel my heart beating,
Chain reaction,

Slowly caressing, sexual sensation,
I need only you,
You are my stimulation,

Arouse me, place me upon your lips,
Let me come inside you,
As I drown your chin between my hip's,

Pleasure me, while I pleasure you,
Don't be shy now,
You know what to do,

Bring it, Bring it all,
Let me endorse you standing,
With your back against the wall,

Legs Locked tight, Around your waist,
Back curved,
Breathing aloud, Face to face,

Chest to chest, hearts beating,
The orgasmic endorphine,
You been needing,

Explosive Passion, so sublime,
As you come inside me,
It's pure ecstasy lost in time.

I AM

I am like the rainy day, you make the rainbow,
I am a sailboat stuck out at sea, you make the wind blow,
I am lost in the dark night, you always find me,
When I have fear, you love me unconditionally.

I am a bird with a broken wing, you help me to fly,
I am a tiny pebble, you are the stone that helps me to try,
I am the foggy glass, you make me clear,
When I am outta control, you help me steer.

I am Pandora's box, you are my peace,
I am locked up, you hold the key's,
I am the bitter, you are the sweet,
When I feel half, you make me complete.

Suicide

Slitting my wrist
Who will miss
the real me
Resignation
To obligation
Pain is what I
Need.

Memories Set
My life's bet,
Desensitized,
Self Destroying,
Never enjoying,
Deaf to lies,

What I saw,
My firewall,
My Boundaries,
Controlling me,
So Selfishly,
Living miseries,

Feeling faint
Blood like paint
Catastrophe
Deviation
from revelation
I am no saint
Bleeding emotionally.

Tetracty...Something New I Tried....

Love
Healing
Therapy
Everlasting
The purest feeling has taken my soul
Taken over my own heart beats control
Insoluble
Inviting
Feeling
You

Part 1

It's not writer's block, it's just me on the block, got my heart on lock, can't seem to shake it off, dreams I have broken, one by one, watching them go away with the setting sun, watching days turn to nights, as i tremble cutting off the lights, losing focus losing sights,a daydream away from another broken heart, where do i start, so far apart,another car crashing sublimely, but i can only confide in me, setting goals setting marks to make, nothin left to take,saying prayers for each and every mistake, still the same but ever changing, still my self just rearranging, self inventory, that's the story, with rhyme and lot's of reason, i see a new horizon, a whole new season, but it's not jus me i am going to be pleasin...
one...
two...
three...
four...
wait who's keeping time, who's keeping score, set my sight's on what i really want, what i really need, how to own it, how to succeed, not sayin everything is going to be sugar sweet, i know there's a world of battles to defeat, just doin my part to start, because after all i made this mess, i must confess, so now it's time to make it right, step back analyze, allow my promises to God make realize, it's where I need to be, and not only be true to others but be true to me......